sitting, waiting, wishing

As you can imagine I’ve had a LOT of time on my hands the past 6 days. Never through any two week wait before has life felt like 24 hours was more like 24 days. Every cramp, itch, pulse in my body triggers some sort of emotion and I’m sure the progesterone is not helping. In fact, I know it’s not because you know what? Progesterone side effects mimic pregnancy. Lucky me, right? While I’m trying to keep my eye on the prize, I am filling my days with work and my evenings with friends and family. I try to sleep as much as I can but without fail I wake up around 5 a.m. most mornings and my brain is in full blown hamster wheel mode. Lovely. I decided that once a day I will try to take a few moments completely to myself and reminisce on happy memories from the past. Today I thought I’d share this memory. This picture was taken in November 2008 (about 3 months before I met Shawn for the first time). I went on a 3-week backpacking trip across the west coast of Australia. My sister lived in Perth at the time and her and I did a 10 trek up the west coast from Perth to Broome. On my way back home I stopped in Sydney for a night and that’s when I decided I HAD to go skydiving. Thankfully a lovely friend I made on the trip arranged everything for me so when I arrived in Sydney I just had to jump on a train and 2 hours later I’d be at the skydiving spot. Keep in mind I was completely alone at this point of my trip. I arrived in Sydney a little later than anticipated that day and had time to drop my bags at my hostel and run to the train station. Luckily I made it with minutes to spare and when I arrived at my stop I called the skydiving company who sent a driver to pick me up. On our way to the location, I heard talk about the heavy winds and how we may not be able to jump that day. I felt slightly discouraged but waited to get more information. Upon arrival it was confirmed that due to winds, our jumps may all be cancelled that day and pushed to the next day. Well, that wouldn’t work for me as I was flying back to Toronto at 11 a.m. the next morning. I panicked a bit but found a nice picnic table to hang out at while I waited for the news. Finally, around an hour later, we were informed that the jumps WOULD be happening but that we wouldn’t be able to land on the beach as originally planned. YAY! I was sooooo happy but it only took about 15 minutes to go from happy to sad again. You see, there was a limited number of seats on the plane and they were only sending it up one more time that day. I was the odd woman out. There was no room for me on that plane and I was pretty upset. It was the one thing I wanted to do to finish that trip off and now I would just watch everyone else go up but me.  About 15 minutes later everyone was boarding the plane when one of the reps came over to me to apologize that his colleague made an error on the count and that I in fact DID have a seat on the plane. Up, up I went and jumped from a plane at 14,000 feet above the Sydney coast. The 60 second free fall was one of the most exhilarating feelings I’ve ever experienced and I was so happy that I cried after. I remember how many emotions I felt that day and I’m glad I didn’t turn around the first time they mentioned the jumps might have been cancelled. I persevered right until the end even though I didn’t know what the outcome would be. Fast forward to current day and I find myself doing the same. It’s amazing how these little lessons that you think you’ll never apply to life again have a way of making their way back full circle. I won’t give up, I will make the jump again (maybe not from an airplane) but things seem to have a way of working themselves out sometimes.

australia2

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Just a couple of cool kids trying to have their own cool kid!

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